Petty Officers

Some write alternate history because they wish things were different; others write alternate history as a way of exploring what actually happened. And some write alternate history to spite other people who like alternate history. For instance, the encounter at Block Island we have described previously took place in June 1862, but is placed in a chapter that otherwise takes place in November 1862. There is absolutely no reason for this to be told in flashback- so why was it put here?


In February 2015, robcraufurd (of rifles thesis fame) made a comment in the story thread of our very own Canuck's Wrapped in Flames. This comment, rather innocuous in itself, was to the effect that:

Bythesea also travelled on board USS Miantonomoh during its voyage from Newfoundland to Queenstown in 1866, when he concluded that a two-man boarding party with hammers and wedges could put its turret out of action. Just throwing that idea out there.

This suggestion apparently made TFSmith furious enough to respond with a message full of passive-aggressive sarcasm and smilies, citing various examples in the South American wars where boarding actions went wrong. Sadly, it never occurred to TFSmith to actually check the opinions of the Monitor's commander about the likelihood of a successful boarding action, which produces a compeletely different picture:

• 27 January 1862: Lieutenant Worden expresses his belief that 'if she is boarded by the enemy, they cannot get below nor into the turret, and her decks can be swept by her own guns loaded with canister.'
• 9 March 1862: Battle of Hampton Roads, at which Virginia attempts to board the Monitor
• 10 March 1862: Lieutenant Worden expresses his belief that 'the "Monitor" could be boarded and captured very easily- first, after boarding, by wedging the turret, so that it would not turn, and then by pouring water in her & drowning her machinery.'

Regardless of the probability of the action's success, the line of continuity is clear. In February 2015, robcraufurd made TFSmith aware of Bythesea's opinion about Monitor's vulnerability. On 1 March 2015, TFSmith posted Chapter 10 part 2 in which one character 'had served as executive officer of Monitor in her fight with Meteor in June'. On 31 March 2015, TFSmith posted Chapter 11 part 1, a bizarrely-backdated action in which Bythesea tries to board Monitor and is killed for his idiocy.

Even with the best will in the world, it will never be possible to give a proper answer to the question of how much of BROS is simply an attempt to put one over on those who offended TFSmith. Nevertheless, it is perhaps a reminder that it is very difficult to produce good art with only negative goals. The proper place to take out this kind of petty resentment is a blog, where you can do things like point out that Captain Vansittart of HMS Ariadne has his name mispelled as 'Vanistart' no fewer than three times during BROS.